I’ve lost a bunch of hats, and my head feels funny!

If you had to come up with one word to describe yourself or your current situation in life, what would it be? I can imagine coming up with one word might actually prove to be very difficult.

If you are like most, you’re wearing any number of hats on any given day given your current situation…parent, spouse, employee, employer, entrepreneur, chauffeur of children, coach of your son or daughter’s team, caretaker of a child, a spouse or a parent…and the list goes on and on.

Those hats change every so often, and especially when you enter each new season in life. From being young parents, to middle-aged married beings with high school or college kids and very busy schedules, to empty nesters to retirees; each season can bring about change that is gradual or very swift, but regardless of either, it brings about a change in the hats we wear.

I’ve come to the conclusion that these past few months, while I’ve been tackling time management alongside puppy rearing and playtime, I’ve also been tackling something I hadn’t realized was even an obstacle. That obstacle was my inability to realize that my expectations in life were drawn from how I managed myself when I was wearing previous hats, in previous seasons, under previous situations.

I failed to realize that I was undergoing a transition.

In my last post I commented on warmer days or my next vacation and, honestly, those days were just right around the corner because I left only a week later for a vacation in a warmer state to celebrate my birthday. And this wasn’t just any birthday; it was a big one. One of those birthdays you say doesn’t really bother you, because your age is just a number, right? Honestly, it really didn’t bother me, until I got to thinking more seriously about it.

What got me thinking more seriously about it was the fact that I’ve entered a new season, but my mindset might not have caught up to the idea that my life has changed quite a bit. My life is not what it was before when I wore all those hats as a busy mom, wife and daughter, who also worked for someone else or for herself while running her own business. I’m not an empty nester yet, but it’s close, and while I enjoy spending time with my husband, and having a puppy feels like having a child again (pure understatement, really J), my schedule is not wrapped around what everyone else in the household is doing or what an employer requires of me.

My schedule is my own.

That one little fact in addition to the entry into a new decade has left me just a little breathless. All those hats I use to wear, which we all know can get a little heavy sometimes since women are so terrible at finding time to take them all off to care for themselves, have dwindled down to just a few. Imagine, rather than the idiom reference, if you wore one real hat every single day for a whole year, how would your head feel when you finally took it off? It may feel very much like what it is to suddenly not be so many things to so many other people.

While I have been more committed to self care the past year or so, I thought it was just because I had finally realized how absolutely necessary it was. However, it may have been my way of preparing for the upcoming transition I was going to go through. I just hadn’t realized it at the time.

Being so many things to so many people for awhile begins to feel normal, maybe because the constant pull in so many directions gives a false sense of feeling grounded. But when change occurs and you’re not pulled in all different directions, you may feel a little off balanced if some of the tugging suddenly stops. That’s how I visually see things when it comes to what some women must feel like when this sort of transition occurs.

Writing is one way that keeps me grounded, which may seem funny since my books are all fiction. I also have a number of ways to focus on self care, such as journaling, yoga, and so forth, but as with anything, I’ll learn as I go to determine what works best for me. A transition also means change or evolution, which also means progression and development. It means learning more about yourself and evolving as you continue to move forward. It also means, no matter what age you are, how many hats you wear or what season you’re in, what you learn about yourself will help you through each transition and hopefully as you move on into the next.

Whatever season you’re in, however many hats you wear, I hope you take time to focus on self care and find what also keeps you grounded so that when all the tugging suddenly stops, you don’t find yourself unbalanced and flat on your back.

Quarterly check in: April showers, fur babies & serial killer?

As I sit at my desk contemplating what I might want to blog about today, I’m hearing the constant downpour on the rooftop just outside my office window. The forecast for today indicates 100% chance of rain, but I really don’t need a weather app to tell me that.

Growing up in the Pacific Northwest means this much rain doesn’t faze me all that much. In fact, I find it kind of soothing. Of course, what I really mean is that I find it soothing when I can remain indoors, warm and dry. If I have to venture out and drive in it, I’m really not all that thrilled. And, to be honest, as much as I don’t mind the rain, I’ll admit I longingly look forward to warmer days when I can spend more time outside or when I can take part in a vacation to a warmer climate.

Until those warmer days or my next vacation, today is a day when I’m staying put so if Mother Nature wants to treat us to an excessive amount of rain, so be it.

Since rain does mean staying put on a Sunday afternoon, I’m taking time today to go through my writing tasks to get a sense of where I am with them, or how far behind I might be, in order to run through a quarterly review. I’m already aware of the fact that I’ve had good days and bad days when it came to staying on task the past few months, for various reasons, so the fact that I’m behind isn’t a surprise.

Koa & Kai - inseparable

Having a puppy and two kittens that constantly demand my attention is obviously one of the biggest reasons I’ve been distracted the past two months. 

From the kittens chewing or scratching up papers, to digging miniatures out of my dollhouse, to sitting on my desk right in front of my computer screen, and from Jozee needing regular potty breaks and chewing on shoes and walls and the kittens themselves, I’m up and out of my chair more times than I can count. If I had a dollar for every time I said the words, “no” or “stop that,” I’d be set for life! But then the kittens eventually settle down, Jozee does her best to behave, and I keep telling myself to just breathe…it’s temporary…it’s just temporary…eventually I’ll get back on a regular schedule. And at least I’m moving more regularly and keeping up a good step count. J

Jozee

January was a productive month, and I was able to complete the tasks necessary so that the fourth book in my series was finally published the first part of February. Just in time, too, since the beginning of February was primarily focused on Jozee. 

The rest of February and much of March were hit and miss when it came to making real headway on my projects, but between my young adult, another book in the series, and a short story, when I do find the time to work I have plenty to work on.

Between watching Jozee and the kittens to working on my books in between naps and play time (seriously!), here are just a few other notes with regard to my recent progress:

I shared in one of my last blog posts that I had started reading “The Artist’s Way” and that I was going to try to make use of the morning pages idea – that didn’t really pan out for me. I was too busy with Jozee first thing in the morning and by the time I was able to sit down to work on anything, I wanted to use my limited free time to work on my books. I’m probably going to try the idea again in another month or so.

I did, however, begin reading again “The Writer’s Workout” by Christina Katz. Right now this type of book is easier for me to stick with and the daily tips will continue to push me as I move forward and continue to adjust my new writing schedule around the daily distractions of fur babies and whatever else pops up.

I also shared in a past post about my attempt to start using a bullet journal – I’m finally getting the hang of it and I really enjoy it. It’s messy, compared to all the pretty examples I see others sharing, but it works for me and I love the freedom I have to make it my own so that it works for me.

I got our taxes done – have to celebrate that one! J

And, odd fact, I was running through and updating information on all the characters in my series – I found it interesting that I’ve killed off 12 characters so far. I’m a virtual serial killer. Not sure what to think about that!

Although I feel behind on some tasks, I’m still making progress as I’m able, and as long as I continue to do that, all will be well. Just like the little saying I have at the beginning of my bullet journal, “A little progress each day adds up to big results.”

Have a great day!